You might have the technical skills you need to succeed. You’ve invested time and effort to polish those skills that make you a great engineer, product manager, accountant, or attorney – you name it. You have what it takes. However, there’s something holding you back: your soft skills. Before COVID, the sociology professor at Stanford University, Shelley Corell, and the sociology PhD student Julia Mellin found a 6-month program in which women in tech meet online with coaches and peers to help them expand their soft skills. The result: The researchers found that women rated their workplace soft skills higher after participating in the program — an average increase of 9% over pre-pandemic levels. A control group of women who didn’t take part decreased their self-assessments by an average of 3.5% over the same period.

You might be wondering which soft skills you should focus on. In my experience, two have radically transformed my involvement in the workspace, not only as an individual collaborator but also as a manager: effective communication and negotiation.

Effective communication

For me, effective communication consists of three main points: understanding your audience, choosing the right timing, and using the appropriate channels. First, before conveying your message, you should understand your audience. Ask yourself questions that help you mold your words and message accordingly. For instance, is your message intended for a single individual or a group of people? Who is the person? What’s your relationship with them? What is your objective? Don’t click ‘send’ or join that Zoom call until you have these details.

Second, choose the right timing. Many times, I’ve studied my audience carefully but haven’t chosen the right timing. I remember a time when I needed to inform my boss about a significant operational issue that could result in a loss of thousands of dollars. By the time I decided to let him know about the issue, I didn’t have any solutions in mind. BAD TIMING! That decision resulted in a difficult conversation. If I had brought solutions before reaching out, he would have reacted differently. On the other hand, when I asked for a promotion, I waited until our feedback review to present him with the results of my past months and then expressed my readiness for the next step. I received a positive performance review that allowed me to present my case. I was promoted!

Third and lastly, think about the right channels. Now that many companies still work remotely, choosing the right channels can be tricky. Not all of us can meet in person to convey our message. However, you can choose between having a Zoom call to be ‘face to face’ with your recipient or simply sending a quick text. Identify your communication alternatives within your company and do a simple exercise to determine the best way to use each of them.

Bonus: Be a good listener. I once took an effective communication course where I learned something that has helped me be a better listener ever since: if you’re thinking about your answer or next comment while listening, you’re not truly listening!

Negotiation

Personally, negotiation was one of the toughest soft skills I had to develop. Negotiation is about creating a safe environment to promote agreements that suit the needs of everyone. It’s not about winning; it’s about understanding the balance between your needs and your counterpart’s. If you, like me, try to avoid conflict, consider this: when starting a negotiation, think about the minimum you’re willing to give. The asset could be money, perks, deliverables – it doesn’t really matter. What matters is that you have a clear self-understanding of your expected outcome and a solid baseline. To practice, start with small things. For example, when asking a stakeholder team for something, negotiate the delivery times for the outcome. Use your effective communication skills to share why and what the benefits of your proposal are.

Developing leadership skills such as effective communication and negotiation can have a real impact on your interactions with peers and stakeholders. Perform self-reflection to identify the soft skills that will help boost your performance